5969 Days and Counting

This is actually the first post written to my new weblog. I intend to add some posts later that I will backdate, so they will appear in a more orderly fashion, but this is the first bonafide post.

There is not a person in my life that justifies the subject of this first post more than my son Cameron. Since he was born, over sixteen years ago, there has never been a day that I haven’t thought about him. Often, my heart has ached because of the divorce that separated us when he was merely three years old.

For some reason unknown to me, I can only see his face when I close my eyes and no other loved one. I cannot envision my grandparents, my parents, my wife, nor either of my other two sons, only Cameron. However, it is a three-year old Cameron and not the present one who is now in his mid-teens that I see in my mind.

He was an exceptional boy then. He was adventurous and obedient at the same time. His mother, Tara, and I rarely needed to scold him. It is as if he was born with a conscience. And love! Oh, there was great love in that little boy’s heart. He loved to give and receive hugs. My son Billy is a little bit like that, but nothing compared to Cameron.

The whole divorce between his mother and I was unfortunate. I believe that, had we been more mature about the situation than we were, the divorce wouldn’t have taken place at all. I’m certain that I’ll write in greater detail about this in other posts, as it was a low point in my life.

Often times, I look back at the mistakes I made and realize that I wouldn’t have received the blessings that I do now, if I hadn’t have made those mistakes. Such is the case with this situation. If I had never divorced Tara, I would never have married my current wife and had two other children that I love very much.

I am grateful to have played a part in Cameron’s life, albeit a minor one. Make no doubt about it that I wanted more. For years, I have yearned to play a major role in his development. However, circumstances prohibited me from doing that. I don’t want to get into the specifics of those circumstances, as I’m certain I will at another time, in other posts. For now, I’ll just let this first post stand as a tribute to my number one son. He will always have a special place in my heart. As I write this post, I wonder where is he now, what is he doing, and if he is safe. I frequently pray for his success in all of the righteous things that he attempts to do.

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